We probably assume that our friends, colleagues, and other people we know are doing fine. The blossoming new relationships we notice around us are probably wonderful! But is that always true? How sexually confident are we, really? And how willing are we to disclose our insecurities regarding the way we feel about ourselves and our bodies?
Confidence regarding our sex life can be corroded by previous difficult relationships and partners who have given us judgmental messages based on their own insecurities and a vicious cycle can start.
For women, body image is a real issue. Few women feel confident about their bodies, especially after childbirth, weight gain, and when constantly comparing themselves with others.
Men are often just as insecure about their bodies. They have their own set of issues about body, performance, size, and a whole bunch of other erroneous views. Sexual confidence starts with “liking” yourself. If you choose to accept how you look, just the way you are, you'll be more confident with a partner.
I notice people who are confident in most areas of their lives, but within their relationship with their partners, they have problems with intimacy, and/or sexual performance. Some of the issues that come up are:
• Lacking the skills to communicate about sexual issues
• Embarrassment and sometimes fear to talk about sex
• Performance anxiety due to lack of sex education
• Low sexual self-esteem
• Psychological issues due to background or upbringing
In my opinion, 'sexual confidence' is not explored enough and it can certainly become a stumbling block -- therefore, good sexual education is essential!